I heard a trainer say that the dog should feel comfortable enough that the owner doesn't always need to be in sight
Well, true to a degree, but not completely with this breed, which specifically was bred over generations to bond very closely to people and want them nearby,
Many cavaliers also typically bond specifically to one person.
Oliver should be independent enough that you can leave him on his own if and when needed. But it is typical of the breed to follow you around in this way. :lol:
Jaspar is fine if I leave himin a room when I am out of the house -- even if I am in the house and need to put him in a room, he eventually settles (because I have gradually trained him to accept being alone -- that is something everyone should do with any dog). But -- he will scream if I go out of sight if I head to the bathroom when I have him at the DTI training centre.
Yet at home I can go close the bathroom door, take a shower -- and he'll just sleep out on the couch (when younger, he wasmore anxoious and wanted to lie on the floor of the bathroom if allowed). So he doesn't have separation anxiety exactly -- he can happily be left on his own in many situations -- but he does have an extra clingy cavalier personality in *some* situations.
Likewise, I work at home in an upstairs room and most of the time if I get up to go downstairs three little cavaliers also all get up and follow me down. Then they all get up again and follow me back up 5 minutes later, and so on and so on through the day. If they don't actually all come down, they line up across the top stair and peer down at me to see what I am doing and if it is worth their time to come settle downstairs.
I know very few cavaliers that will just stay in one room while their person disappears off to another part of the house, but some do.
I actually get cavaliers handed into rescue primarily because they are this clingy. I make it really clear to people that this is the breed personality and if they want a more aloof dog, they need to consider a different, more independent, breed. I find some breeders do not even explain the basics of the breed to puppy buyers and this can cause problems when the dog they get isn't the independent, outdoor family dog they were looking for. It's why it is really important to research breeds as much as possible and not just get a dog because of its looks or size.
Two things about meeting people -- carry some treats in your pocket -- lots of small kibble pieces are good -- and when someone approaches, toss a treat down on the ground before Oliver so that the arrival of a person is a GOOD thing in his mind! Hewill likely be distracted by the treats too and foget to bark. Just keep tossing them now and again while the person is there. And ignore any barking' don;t even look at him. He will look to you for reassurance when barking and verification that he's doing good -- making eye contact reassures him that yes, this is a helpful thing, and keep doing it! So you don;t want to pay attention to him when he barks, but praise him quietly while the person is there if he is quietly looking at you in expectation (of a treat!) or keeping busy with the treat. You can also work to teach 'quiet' and then use that when people come up but he needs to learn this well first.
Second: most dogs actually do not like being pet on the head. A hand moving over a dog's head is quite threatening in dog language. They tolerate this and many learn that tolerating it brings enjoyable attention and stroking anmd will relax. But dogs much prefer being pet on their chest or their sides, gently, NOT their heads. In rescue people are always saying things like 'that dog was beaten because he shies away from hands' but this is simply not true for most dogs -- they just dislike being touched on the head, especially by strangers, especially if they feel stressed (as some will by strangers). None of my dogs likes being pet on the head and all will duck away from a hand approaching its head, for example. So just ask people to pet him on the side, eg on his shoulders, or gently on his chest, sitting down perhaps (dogs also dislike someone arching over them). See:
http://diamondsintheruff.com/bodylangspaceinvaders.html