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Sue.k
8th June 2007, 10:58 AM
I am very worried about Prince, since Lucy's arrival he has gone really quiet and wont play with his toys. When I came down this morning he had wet the floor, this is very unusual for him. Is it normal for him to be a bit off, will it improve with time? They get along ok, there is alot of sniffing from Prince and he tried to mount Lucy yesterday, I am very worried that she will snap at him. Will they eventually sleep together or will he always be put out by her? When I am petting Prince she comes over and he just walks away, she really is bossy and wants all the attention. I am making sure to always greet Prince first, let him out the door 1st etc. Advice would be very welcome, am I doing everything right or should I be totally ignoring Lucy until Prince comes to accept her? I have them both sleeping in the utility room with a baby gate between them, when I put Lucy in she cries alot and Prince just takes a peek in at her and comes back out again. I leave the gate open during the day but she wont go and sleep on her bed she just lies on the floor in the kitchen. I really dont want Prince to be upset, I really hope this will improve with time, I badly need reassurance, I was so upset this morning when I seen he wet the floor, it is just so not like him, I am so worried about my little baby :(

*Pauline*
8th June 2007, 11:10 AM
I'm not the best person to advise on this as I only have one dog but I see no one has responded to your post yet and you sound quite upset so I thought I'd say something.

I think you'll find lots of people here have had the same experience. He probably is a bit put out but he will get over it.

She may snap at him if he tries to mount her, but she has no other way of saying "No!". Dylan tried to mount his friend Toto and she snapped at him. She didn't bite him or anything. They have to sort these things out like dogs do.

Maybe it would be nice if they slept together but listen to what others have to say. Is prince neutered? :hug:

Cleo's Person
8th June 2007, 11:16 AM
Pauline, you just beat me to the post.

Sue, again I only have one dog - but I seem to remember reading on other threads that it can take some time for dogs to become acustomed to each other. This might take some time. I think perhaps best not to reinforce new behaviour eg not to make a big fuss to Prince about the wetting etc as you don't want this becomming 'normal' attention seeking behaviour for him. I supose really you just have to try to treat them exactly the same - they're probably both wanting to be your favourite and wanting to be the one you spend most time with.

I'm sure that those who have more than one dog will be able to offer much more sage advice. :flwr:

Sue.k
8th June 2007, 11:23 AM
Yes, they are both desexed. I didnt make a fuss over Prince when he had wet the floor, I just let him out and cleaned it up, I wouldnt give out to him over it, I know he is just out of sorts. I just hope he gets back to his old self because he is such fun and we finally got the garden sorted so he didnt know himself with all the space to play and then Lucy arrived and as you can imagine things have changed a little for him. I know I am probably getting upset over nothing, its just he is my little baby and I dont want him to be hurt :(

Charleen
8th June 2007, 11:29 AM
I think you just have to give it more time. You did the right thing in not making a big deal about the accident. It sounds like Prince doesn't like change. Mounting is a sign of dominence, so Prince was telling Lucy he was the boss. So keep doing what you are doing for a little while longer and I think Prince will come around.

Lisa_T
8th June 2007, 11:31 AM
It does take time, and perhaps especially so when you have two adults. Treat them equally, give them individual time, and let them sort it out for themselves- within reason! But certainly at this point they should not be left alone together unsupervised or uncrated.

I can't say much more as my second dog was a puppy and that's a rather different kettle of fish, but good luck!

Cleo's Person
8th June 2007, 11:33 AM
Sue, I really feel for you as undergo this difficult transition. Hopefully as they get to know each other better, and get used to being around each other, Prince will return to his usual sunny self. It sounds like you're doing all the right things, so its just a matter of time. Easy to say, I know, and not necessarily so easy while things sort themselves out. :flwr: :hug: to you all.

sarahg
8th June 2007, 12:13 PM
Sue, I rememeber when my partner bought Daisy home, Lady hated her she would growl and snap at her all the time, she also started weeing everywhere. After about a week they were inseprable and still are. Give them time Sue im sure they will fine. Lady also was the same when we bought Billy home, but now they all get on really well. :flwr:

Sarah Xxx

Scouty girl
8th June 2007, 12:30 PM
Sue,

My other dog is a Newfoundland so I might have had a little different experience. When I brought Scout home Breeze would look at me as if to say....Ok when is she going to her real home. Everytime Scout would get near her Breeze would get up and move. Scout would bite her ears, bark at her and jump on her. Although Breeze was never cross with her, you could tell she didn't aprpeciate it. There were never any squabbles. They are both females.

After about three weeks, just out of the blue, for what seemed like no reason whatsoever, Breeze just started playing with Scout and it's been that way every since.

Give Prince time. It is a very big change for him. Like bringing a new baby into the house when you already have a 3 or 4 year old. It will work out be patient. Don't let Prince see that you are anxious.

Sue.k
8th June 2007, 12:34 PM
Thanks everyone, I am feeling alot better. I am not going to give up on them getting along, I know its only early days (people always tell me off for mothering Prince so much, I am very protective of him) I am sure he will come around after a few weeks, I just cried when he wouldnt play with his ball, he just seemed so fed up. I know I shouldnt stop him when he is sniffing Lucy but I am so terrified she will bite him, my partner keeps telling me that if she does snap at him he wont do it again, I know he is right but Prince is such a softie, I would hate him to get snapped at, sure he nearly looses his life when she sneezes, I know thats my fault for treating him like a baby, he does need to toughen up a little, thanks again for your support, its really helped x

Cathy Moon
8th June 2007, 02:09 PM
I've had similar experiences both times I brought a new cavalier into the family, thinking I'd made a mistake! Hang in there for a few weeks, and Prince will come around to his old self, plus he'll be happier because he has a new friend and companion.

To help cheer him up, you can take him for a walk or drive somewhere with just him. That will help assure him that he still has you to himself sometimes. Or if your partner could take Lucy out for a walk, maybe Prince will play ball with you at home.

Karlin
8th June 2007, 02:20 PM
Lots if good advice above. :)

Re mounting: dogs do this, also females to females, males to males, females to males, for many reasons and why is not well understood. It can be play behaviour, it can be one dog showing the other it runs the show, it can just feel good, it can be sexual interest. Desexed animals are not asexual animals remember. :) So he may just find her an attractive older woman. :lol: There's a thread on mounting behaviour in the Library section that has a lot of info on what experts think this kind of behaviour might be all about.

Re the weeing: a very, very common reaction for a dog that is a bit stressed or also, simply identifying its territory or claiming, this is my home (that's one reason they often pee on our beds!). My mom's dog does this when she is stressed and did it for a while when she first went to live with my parents. Lily did it too, and Jaspar would pee on the floor for a while right after I got Leo. So just keep doing what you did -- I am sure it will quickly stop and may not be repeated at all.

Prince is just a bit grumpy because he doesn't yet realise how much fun it will be to have a friend. :) Think of a child whose cousin has come to stay for a visit -- if they aren't friends, the child might be a bit put out at not getting 100% attention and also that his routine is upset.

Lucy is looking for lots of attention because she wants reassurance and also is stressed at being in a new situation where nothing is familiar. Just ignore her constant demands and treat both dogs as you would prefer to keep on -- eg don;t give special privileges to either if that's not what you want to keep on doing. But do make sure Prince gets extra time.

I wouldn't focus on letting him out first or anything like that -- this can actually cause problems if the natural hierarchy these dogs choose ends up that she is the more dominant. Stressing the he is more important can throw the 'real boss' into bad behaviour as she starts to try and prove through unwanted behaviour that hey, it's ME that is top dog! Neither dog is likely to care who is 1 and who is 2 (and it often is the female who is 1). They just like to be aware of it for their own relationship, just as you would know in your place of work who to defer to and who is your work equal and who can be asked to do things for you. When we intervene because we feel the first dog in the house should be number 1, and that's not the actual case, it can make the number 2 dog anxious for being pushed into a role it doesn't have, and the number 1 dog anxious for being forced to have to prove to you and the other dog that it is the real boss.

Hence I'd just take a step back and not worry about those kinds of details. Just enjoy both, don't even worry if she snaps or he snaps, as long as they aren't actually fighting. A snap is just a polite but firm way for a dog to indicate someone or something is pushing its boundaries. They rarely actually make any contact and the other dog almost always will recognise the warning for what it is and desist and be more carefl in future. :)

Yvonne117
8th June 2007, 02:38 PM
Harvey hated Alfie and I thought I had made the worst mistake gettting two. Look at them now. It just takes a while for them to adjust. http://farm1.static.flickr.com/221/526725837_4c589fba05.jpg

Karlin
8th June 2007, 03:05 PM
A picture is worth a thousand words! :lol:

*Pauline*
9th June 2007, 03:42 AM
What a lovely picture Yvonne.:D

Caraline
9th June 2007, 03:53 AM
I think this sounds really normal for the early days. Two strangers have been thrust together and it takes them time to figure each other & the relationship out. I'd just carry on as normal, not making a fuss over anybody or anything, but quietly keeping an eye on them. If they have a little spat, then I think it is best to not intervene unless it looks like turning into a full blown fight. Both of them will draw up boundaries and both will have little snaps at each other if that line is crossed. They need to do this! Just keep an eye on them is all. :flwr:

Sue.k
13th June 2007, 03:51 PM
Well Prince and Lucy seem to be getting along better, he is still afraid of her though, when she tries to play with him he either stands still or runs away, bless him, he is such a softie. Will post more pictures as soon as I can. Thanks for all of the advice and help :)

*Pauline*
13th June 2007, 04:03 PM
Well Prince and Lucy seem to be getting along better, he is still afraid of her though, when she tries to play with him he either stands still or runs away, bless him, he is such a softie. Will post more pictures as soon as I can. Thanks for all of the advice and help :)

That too sounds like normal play. Dylan's best mate pins him down, then as soon as she takes her attention off Dyaln, he comes running to her making her chase him. It isn't always how it looks. His running away could be him saying "chase me!".