View Full Version : Bonding : Is It Mum Or Dad ?

Brian M
5th March 2008, 12:21 PM

Even though i work full time and Dawn is at home 24/7 with the girls ,i was just wondering why they have bonded so close to me ,which of course i thoroughly enjoy. As soon as i arrive home they follow me everywhere in the garden upstairs downstairs every single place , on a Tues and Thurs i take Luke to his Shotokan class at a sports centre in Liverpool and on these nights i just sit in the car and listen to the radio and the girls come with me ,I normally put my seat back a bit so i am virtually lying flat then Rosie climbs onto my chest and Daisy curls up on my lap while Poppy occupies the passenger seat then we all have an hours snooze. Is the bonding to me so strong because i always prepare their food and feed them and its always Luke and i that take them for their walks or are there any other factors that come into the equation or would you agree that Food ,Walks and Attention/Cuddles are all our cavaliers need , or is there anything else ?.And what sex do our cavaliers follow are the majority of them Mummy's little darlings or Daddy's boys and girls ?.

5th March 2008, 01:48 PM
I'm no expert and my pup is a rescue. Even though I am home with him 24/7 he is bonded with my dh and will listen to his commands, ignoring mine. I've met a few ppl who are expert attendees as obedience trainers for their pups. Each individual I've met say dogs respond more to men's voices than they do to the mum's. Next, pup or rescue will definitely be a girl even if they are more difficult. I think I can relate to girls more than little boys. JMHO

5th March 2008, 02:07 PM
However, I am the one who feeds them and provides them with all they need. Plus, they come to work with me every day. :blabla:

5th March 2008, 02:23 PM
Dottie loves to be loved by anyone who is in the room, but when all is said and done, she is most closely bonded to me. I am home 24/7 and feed her, groom her, take her for most of her walks and up at night when she needs her potty breaks.

She follows me everywhere, although she is crate trained, and we can leave her for an hour or two if necessary. I am going to delegate some of these tasks to my husband when he retires, and I often wonder if she will still be mostly in my lap or switch to his. :rolleyes:

Barbara Nixon
5th March 2008, 03:40 PM
Monty isn't over fussy and is quietly friends with anyone. Like Izzy was, Joly is very much my dog, though, unlike izzy, Joly fusses everone. Teddy is often all over David, but it's cupboard love, as I'm the one he obeys.

5th March 2008, 03:54 PM
My two love us all but they follow me everywhere and i get the biggest welcome, the only bug bear i have is that i do all the feeding, grooming, walking, training, but i can't get a good recall with Suki - but my hubby can call her from distance and guarantee she'll come back!!! - make no mistake he makes no attempt to make me feel better about it just gets very smug!!!

5th March 2008, 07:22 PM
I don't really think it's an issue of stronger bonding; more that something new happens when you come home and so it is more interesting to follow you around than sit and do what they have been doing all day. Kids can be just the same -- they get excited when the parent who hasn't been around all day arrives in because it is someone new. :)

Some dogs definitely bond more strongly to one person or another; often each dog will pick a different person. It typically is the person who does the most training or real interactive activity with them but not always. Some dogs respond easily to men probably because voices are lower and sound more authoritative than the baby talk some women tend to use! :lol: Trainers often tell people to use a cheerful but low and firm voice when training. Also men often, ahem, talk less :lol: so some dogs may pay more attention to them and understand more clearly as they don't get a jumble of different words all the time and can distinguish command words more clearly.

In general I think if you were home all day and your wife came home in the evening they'd all follow her around for the evening as she'd be the novelty.

BTW it is a good idea for owners to split duties like feeding and walking and not have the dogs more focused on just one person -- this can cause issues if that person is away and also can mean the dogs truly do not respond well to the other person for obedience, say -- and that may mean not responding in a life and death situation if a dog runs free towards traffic. Both should be equally involved in all aspects of care and training.

5th March 2008, 07:32 PM
...the baby talk some women tend to use!

icon_blshing Guilty!!

5th March 2008, 07:45 PM
My Cav loves me and my husband to death. But I do think I have a slight edge and it's because I do the feeding/walking. My husband and I work together and bring Maggie to work with us...coming home pretty much the same time. I think my husband fusses over her more than I do (he does most of the baby talking actually) and she'll happily snuggle with him and curl up on his chest or on his lap.

But eventually she'll make her way over to me and refuses to budge, even if he calls her. He kinda looks hurt at times. I've told him it's because I'm the feeder, but the other night he joked that it is because I stink like poo and dogs like to roll in it...lol

5th March 2008, 08:07 PM
(he does most of the baby talking actually)

:lol: Well I am all for gender equality!! :dogwlk:

Elaine 2
5th March 2008, 09:04 PM
Cody's a mummy's little girl and l love it, she follows me everywhere

6th March 2008, 12:26 AM
*g* Mine are both firmly attached to me, both adore my parents and grandmother (sweeties in handbag has something to do with that..). Holly also loves my brother, and always has done. I remember being jealous about it when she was tiny. Amber, on the other hand, couldn't care less about him. I think it's partly because he was in Oz for most of Amber's first year with me, and she hasn't seen a great deal of him since.

On the voice issue, I talk baby talk to them during cuddle time and play time, but when I want obedience I use my 'teacher's voice'. It rarely fails. They can distinguish between the tones and respond appropriately. In fact, they usually respond better than the classes did. *sigh*