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View Full Version : How to help a friend who is devasated



jayneuk
18th December 2008, 03:51 PM
I will start from the begining,came in from work had tea then got a phone call from my friend, breaking her heart on the phone telling me her dog was dead.She had took her beloved yorkie out for his teatime walk and went on the fields which is round the corner from her,she had let him off the lead as she always does and he bolted off,she was shouting and looking for him but could'nt find him she got to a busy road and asked someone had they seen a yorkie the guy said he had just seen him run over,not thinking for her own saftey she ran out in the middle of the road and couldnt get to him and by this time she had to press the lights to get over and as she watched in horror another 10 cars went over him,the poor sod had to pick him crumpeled body up dont want to go into details cos it was horiffic,Im so sad for her,i have his parents and gave him to my friend when he was a pup he was out of the first litter are dogs had,so to me he was special and gave him to a special person, she loved that dog and spoiled him he was only 4 years old,she has said she will never have another dog as long as she lives,she feels so guilty and feels its her fault.I know im there for her but how else can i help shes a wonderful person and been freinds for 24years.

*Pauline*
18th December 2008, 03:59 PM
Oh I'm so sorry, this is just awful. I think all you can do is be there for her. She's going to miss that little dog terribly and may need some company. I appreciate it must feel like your loss too as it's was one of your pups :hug:

Daisy's Mom
18th December 2008, 04:14 PM
Oh my goodness that is truly horrible! Poor doggie and poor lady. I know the grief must be compounded with guilt, making everything twice as bad for her. She is in my thoughts and prayers today.

Dublin
18th December 2008, 04:48 PM
OMG thats so sad. I cant imagine how she must feel, but like the others said all you can do if be there for your friend:flwr:

cb2u
18th December 2008, 08:00 PM
What a tragic and horrifying story... nobody should ever have to go through something so horrible. I'm sure your friend will be traumatized for a long time.In my opinion, the only thing you can do is to be by your friend's side with support & understanding. :(

brotymo
18th December 2008, 09:48 PM
Oh, I am so sorry. No one should have to go thru such a thing. There isn't anything you can do to make her pain go away. Perhaps you could ask her for some photos of her dog and you could make a memory photo book from somewhere like Shutterfly for her. We did that when Pixie died and her book sits on our coffee table. I also blame myself for her death, so I know how that complicates things. We enjoy looking at it often, and now it is a source of laughter and fond memories, even though we miss her.
Only time will heal her pain. Perhaps she will change how she feels about another dog in time. I know I love Bandit and Lizzie to death. They can't take Pixie's place, but they have a special place, just as important that is all their own.

All you can do for now is be there to listen to her.

pippa
18th December 2008, 10:39 PM
I am so sorry to hear this,I just don't know what to say.

I will just echo what others have said..all you can do is be there for your friend,it must be very upsetting for you also.

jayneuk
18th December 2008, 10:45 PM
Thankyou for your replys i had to share the story as so many of us trust are
dogs off the lead and my friend never expected that to happened,and cant understand why he ran off.The strange thing is i was telling another friend today and she walks her dog on the same field and her dog done the same thing this morning,lucky enough traffic was really slow and her dog was on the grass verge in the middle of the road only feet away from where jayjay died and her dog never runs off either (very strange).

Elaine 2
19th December 2008, 12:13 AM
OMG that's so sad, your poor friend she'll be in shock after watching this happen to her little lad, she's in my thoughts and prayers

cavmom2
19th December 2008, 04:32 AM
Wow! How terribly sad. The same thing happened to my brother. He was walking his Collie on her lead and took it off as they got to the driveway and she bolted into the street right in front of a car, who was unable to stop. My brother was able to get her to the vet, but to much damage and had to let her go to the rainbow bridge. He felt so guilty for a while. Time heals all wounds. Just be there for her! Let her know that it is not her fault. Dogs do that, they dart and usually when we least expect them to.

Sorry for her loss, just be a shoulder for her to lean on in her time of grief
:(.