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Claire L
1st May 2009, 04:40 PM
I feel like I am giving my child away and it hurts like hell. I have tried and tried to get past what happened to us in January and I just can't do it. The few times that Cara came out with us for a walk, I carried a big stick and Pet Corrector spray but as soon as I saw another dog approaching us, I froze. The feeling of total terror and panic combined with an overwhelming feeling of helplessness is a wall that I am unable to surmount.

Cara misses her pal. Minnie adored her and taught her how to run on the beach and chase Squirrels in the park. Minnie groomed Cara before every outing and Cara even let Minnie push her out of the way to lick her food bowl. They enjoyed each other's company and now Cara seems lost without her sidekick. It would be so easy to just keep Cara indoors and forget about walks and such but it would be wrong and selfish. She deserves to be with another Cavalier and to once again enjoy playing and walking and running free.

Tara (TKC) has very kindly agreed to take Cara and assess her needs and hopefully find her a home with another Cavalier. I know that Tara will find her the most perfect home.

As for me; I shall have to live with the pain of loosing my precious girl but I have to believe that it is what is best for Cara that is most important.
I so hope that whoever adopts Cara, will perhaps keep in touch with us and let us know how she is.

Please think of us tomorrow and wish my little girl a happy ending.

Claire

Aileen
1st May 2009, 04:49 PM
I am so sorry that it has come to this:hug:
---Aileen and the gang (Barney---Jazzie----Jake)

pippa
1st May 2009, 05:08 PM
I'm so sorry Claire......hugs to you and little Cara.

Cathy T
1st May 2009, 05:21 PM
Oh Claire....I am so so sorry it has come to this. I know how hard this has been on you and completely understand your need to put Cara's quality of life before your own feelings. You know Tara will find her a great home. And then you need to just work on yourself, making yourself comfortable again. I'm so sorry Claire, my heart is breaking for you.

Shivers
1st May 2009, 05:29 PM
Claire - I am so sorry this has to happen. It was so obvious from your posts in January how devastated you were at the loss of Minnie. It really is a selfless thing you are doing putting Cara's needs before your own.
I know it will be very hard for you, mind yourself x x

Sue.k
1st May 2009, 06:21 PM
I am so sorry Claire that you are going through this, you are a very brave woman x

ourempire
1st May 2009, 06:35 PM
This decision must have taken very long time to come to, and I know how difficult it is for you. I wish you and Cara all the best tomorrow and onwards. :hug:

Sandrac
1st May 2009, 08:45 PM
Claire - I am so sorry that you have had to make this decision. It must have been so difficult for you, but you are doing the right thing by Cara. Take care of yourself and do keep in touch with us. :hug::hug:

harleyfarley
1st May 2009, 09:16 PM
well done for putting the dogs needs before your own feelings and im sure you wont regret your decision you are such a selfless person, i hope you can keep in touch with her though, di

brotymo
1st May 2009, 10:41 PM
Claire, you are very brave to do this. I was just thinking about you this morning, wondering how you were. I am sure you have thought this out carefully, but I know that doesn't make it easy.
Having rehomed a dog before myself to give him a better suited home, I know how difficult that can be. I had to struggle with feelings that I'd failed him, or was taking the easy way out. In reality, I was wanting him to have what I knew would make him happiest. I do keep in touch with the family of Odin (my vizsla that I rehomed) since I worked with Vizsla rescue to place him and instead of him spending time in foster, he just stayed here with me. It took almost a year to find him the right forever home, but it has worked out wonderfully for him and that makes me happy.

Sabby
1st May 2009, 10:42 PM
Even your heart is breaking you must be a very strong person inside to be so selfless and think of little Cara first. I am crying just sitting here and reading this.
My thoughts are with you and Cara and I am sure she will find a lovely home.
Lots of :hug::hug:hugs to you and Care.

brid kenny
1st May 2009, 10:49 PM
Oh Claire, my heart is broken for you. Will be thinking of you tomorrow.

Ste
1st May 2009, 11:04 PM
I'm sorry you've had to make this decision, I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you :(

tupup
1st May 2009, 11:04 PM
How terribly heartbreaking for you- you must indeed be a strong& selfless person Claire & i will be thinking about you tomorrow
:hug::hug:to you & Cara, take care

Margaret C
1st May 2009, 11:14 PM
You have so obviously thought this through very carefully and made the best decision you can for Cara.
You have my admiration & my sympathy.

I hope that one day you will feel able to have another dog to love.

My very best wishes to you,

Margaret C

Cathy Moon
2nd May 2009, 01:19 AM
:hug: I'm so sorry. This has been very difficult for you. :flwr:

TriTitch
2nd May 2009, 02:38 AM
Thinking of you :( x x x

Rj Mac
2nd May 2009, 09:55 AM
We're thinking of you, this must've been an awfully difficult desicion to make:hug: :hug:

Louise1823
2nd May 2009, 11:46 AM
I cant imagine how hard it was to make that decision Claire, but you are very brave to put Cara first like this. I have absolutely no doubt that Tara will find her the best home, and she couldnt have had a better start than with you and Minnie.
Thinking of you today xxx:hug:

shippers
2nd May 2009, 12:01 PM
You're a very brave person Claire to make this decision for Cara. I bet it has been very difficult over the last few months but you are doing the best thing for Cara. Take care

chloe92us
2nd May 2009, 01:48 PM
Claire, I hope with more time you'll be able to get past your terrible experience and be able to heal from your emotional trauma. I can't imagine how difficult this has been for you. Cara will find a wonderful new home. I can only tell you that after working with rescues that they are very adaptable and she will be fine, although she will always have a special place in her heart just for you. I hope you'll be able to visit and see her every now and again.

Trisha

Lani
2nd May 2009, 02:07 PM
Claire, my heart is breaking for you. :(

You are such a good mommy to Cara to put her needs before your own and find her the right home where all her needs are met. I wish there was something I could say to ease the pain I know you must be going through. :hug:

mounie
2nd May 2009, 02:50 PM
Claire, my thoughts are with you, i wish all the best for you and the little Cara

presley
2nd May 2009, 04:28 PM
I'm so sorry to hear that..
I do know exactly how you feel..because...I'm letting all my dogs to go,two for a while and one to Karlin. I couldn't find someone to look after her,people were not willing to take her cos she's old and she's not properly house trained,she's ex breeding bitch who never lived inside and scared of people..i found it hard,to be honest and major problem is..
My child hasn't been very well past few months,he can be ok one day and get so sick next day,mostly something to do with his chest and gets really asthmatic.
so we decided let the dogs go for a while,til we get our son allergic tested by a proffesional,we've been waiting for it for two months now.

my two are already gone and now I have Betsy only,someone was going to look after her from May but they let me down..I was so happy when this person said she could mind her cos at least i can see her often and bring her back home later on if my son hasn't got allergic to dogs.

like you, I believe Karlin will find the best home for her and Sins, who's going to forster her,will take great care of her too.
I just hope my Betsy won't hate me for this also my other dogs even though I could bring them home later on..

take care of yourself.

meljoy
2nd May 2009, 07:14 PM
Claire,
A completely selfless act. I admire you for your decision and for putting the needs of your little one.
:hug::hug:

Mel

Nicki
3rd May 2009, 02:38 PM
Claire, I'm so very sorry to hear this - it is very hard for you after what you have already been through, but I think you are doing the best for Cara.

This will give you time to help yourself and hopefully at some point in the future you might feel able to take on another dog.

Look after yourself.

Karlin
3rd May 2009, 03:51 PM
I know it is a heartbreaking decision for you but rest assured she will go to a lovely home. Maybe in the future there will be space for a dog again for you. Be sure you get whatever help you need to get through this difficult time. :flwr:

cb2u
3rd May 2009, 04:48 PM
My heart goes out to you. I hope you can find the peace you so deeply deserve. You must be a very strong and generous person, doing what you feel is best for Cara. Hang in there.....

the doll
5th May 2009, 01:18 PM
So sorry to hear your story Claire. I hope were I in your situation I'd have the courage to put the dogs needs first. Best of luck, you're in my thoughts.

heather r
5th May 2009, 10:00 PM
I'm so sorry to hear of your hard decision but you are wonderful to think of the best for your cavalier.

May you find some peace and better times.

Heather R

coconut
5th May 2009, 10:38 PM
Oh claire i am so sorry u are going through this!! i know it is a very hard decision for u to make!!! i am sure karlin will find a very good home for her!

Shelli
6th May 2009, 12:42 AM
Claire, I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. You are such a strong person to make such a selfless decision. Will be thinking of you :hug::hug:
I'm sure Tara will find a perfect home for little Cara :flwr:

jld
6th May 2009, 02:27 AM
Thinking of you and hoping you are at peace with your very difficult decision....

Claire L
6th May 2009, 05:41 PM
Thanks for all the kind words and cyber hugs :flwr: It's very comforting to know that there are people who understand what I have been through.

It was such a hard decision to make but from the feedback that I've gotten so far, it seems like I made the right decision. Cara is doing really well; mixing well with other dogs and generally enjoying her life.

I , on the other hand am not doing quite so well but that is how it is supposed to be. As someone once wrote in a song " I could have missed the pain but I'd have had to miss the dance" and I danced beautifully for two years.

Hope you all don't mind if I hang around for a while and join in the chat.

:flwr:

linderbelle
6th May 2009, 05:54 PM
Oh Claire I've been thinking of you sooooooooo much and so glad you have posted and of course we all want you to stay with us. Hugs.

brotymo
6th May 2009, 06:34 PM
:hug:
Claire, so glad you posted. I just know in my heart that there is a special cavalier somewhere in your future when your heart has mended and your mind healed. You will be a stronger person for all you have been thru and your experiences will surely help you be able to help others.

brid kenny
6th May 2009, 09:07 PM
I'm glad things are going well for Cara. I knew they would in Tars's. Hope you're doing okay too. I was worried that you'd be gone from the board with Cara going. Glad you're hanging around.

pippa
6th May 2009, 09:52 PM
Claire, I had to part with a jack russell I had before I got Gus. I had to rehome him because of jealousy issues he had with my son then only 10.

We tried every kind of training method nothing worked for him with this issue.

His name was Snowy and he was two years old...it broke my heart.I rehomed him through my vet. I never got to see him again ,but I was told he was doing fine and I still think of him often, his picture hangs in my hallway...the funny thing is I always used the words of that same song to explain how I felt about it at the time and still feel. Here are all the words.

Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared beneath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known you'd ever say goodbye
And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance
Holding you I held everything
For a moment wasn't I the king
But if I'd only known how the king would fall
Hey who's to say you know I might have changed it all
And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance
Yes my life is better left to chance
I could have missed the pain but I'd of had to miss the dance

I look forward to talking to you here on cav talk and I'm glad you are staying around :)

PS. I've e-mailed you also.

Lani
6th May 2009, 10:38 PM
Hope you all don't mind if I hang around for a while and join in the chat.

:flwr:

Please stay!! I will miss you if you left here too. You can enjoy having a Cavalier vicariously through our posts without stress and worry that you had when you had your own.

And who knows, maybe one day you'll feel able to try again with another Cavalier ... in time. :)

Aileen
6th May 2009, 11:05 PM
yes please stay
--Aileen and the gang (Barney---Jazzie---Jake)

Masterofsparks
7th May 2009, 02:00 AM
Glad everything is going well with your little one! I know how difficult it must be for you I can't imagine what I would do if I had to give Yoko up but it was a brave hard decision to make.

Jan Bell
7th May 2009, 03:24 PM
Claire I have only just caught up with this thread. Just wanted to say that I, like everybody else here, am thinking of you. It will take time to feel better, but it will happen. You have done your best for Cara and it is good to know she is getting on well.

Best wishes,

Cathy Moon
8th May 2009, 12:52 AM
You belong here - once a cavalier lover = always a cavalier lover! :lotsaluv: