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anniemac
9th May 2011, 12:44 PM
I'm having an extremely hard time dealing with the loss of ella. Please if you could pray for me today, because I really need it. I don't think I can handle this

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Charlifarley
9th May 2011, 01:12 PM
Hi Annie,
Sending you a virtual hug :hug:
You have put so much time and energy into Ella's health and wellbeing, it's natural for you to find that things are difficult right now, hang on in there. I know it's really hard, but you'll get through this, one day at a time.

susandavis1
9th May 2011, 01:23 PM
Sending positive thoughts and strength to you :flwr: :hug:

merello
9th May 2011, 01:52 PM
Anne, you are in our prayers and sending you :hug: I hope you find comfort bringing Ellas ashes home. I know having Sonny back with us gave me a bit of comfort. Stay strong, it's what Ella would have wanted.

Carolxx

brid kenny
9th May 2011, 01:59 PM
Thinking of you. Be patient. Things are still very raw for you. It is such a tough thing to go through.

matties mum
9th May 2011, 02:11 PM
Thinking of you today big hugs from me I hope you have got someone with you who understands how hard it is for you
---Aileen

StillPooh
9th May 2011, 02:12 PM
{{{{{Anne}}}}}

I've lost a number of animals to illness over the years, but not until Dillon did I experience the different pain of an extremely sudden, unexpected loss. Please be gentle with yourself. Each day the sad memories will gradually be pushed aside by those of happier times. And one day, you may find Carly Simon was right- there *is* more room in a broken heart. Enough room for a new wagging tail to move in. It took me 8 months to get there, but I am now an exhausted new 'mom' to an almost 9 week old, named Oliver.

My thoughts and prayers are with you. :hug:

3cavies
9th May 2011, 02:15 PM
Anne,
Just said a prayer for you. You can and will get through this. Like others have said, just take it a day at a time. I've been there and the pain can seem unbearable, but eventually it can be replaced with the joy of countless wonderful memories. Hang in there.

Love my Cavaliers
9th May 2011, 02:51 PM
Oh Anne, it seems to take forever. When we had to put our German Shepherd down because of uncontrollable seizures it was just heart breaking and we even had our little boy Oliver (he was one year old at the time) here to help us through the rough times. I would be driving down the street and just find myself breaking out in tears for no reason - just the thought of her would come to my mind that I would never see her or hold her again, take her for a walk, play fetch, etc.

What did it for me, was seeing how lonely Oliver looked and acted. He was just moping around like the rest of us. So nine months after our Shepherd was PTS, little Riley came into our lives and though Risha (the Shepherd) was not forgotten, our household came alive again. Oliver and Riley played, and she was just the dream dog for us. So, give it time. It is heartbreaking and heart aching and you fell like you will never be the same.

None of our cavaliers has ever taken hold of my husband's heart like Risha did. She was truly his dog. I may be taking back all of my advice when of my four dies and I am in your shoes, since they are truly my heart and soul, much more than Risha ever was. Sending you lots of hugs and kisses and warm wishes.

Chamberlain
9th May 2011, 03:01 PM
I cannot image what you are feeling right now! But please seek help if you your feelings of loss and pain are too overwhelming! I know that is what Ella would want.

anniemac
9th May 2011, 03:04 PM
Thank you all! I can feel the prayers coming. Its amazing I called ella, pooh! So still pooh, your name has an extra special call. I'm even going to post a joke in another topic

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meljoy
9th May 2011, 03:21 PM
Anne,
Grief takes time and you cant expect to lose someone who was such a big part of your life (either human or canine) and get over it so soon.
Hang in there, Im sure in time things will get better. You'll always have a little bit of you missing but remember all the love Ella brought and before long you'l be smiling when you think of her and not shedding tears.
Leo and I are sending hugs and prayers your way:hug:

Erin2854
9th May 2011, 07:15 PM
I happened to have a candle burning on my coffee table when I read your post. I just kneeled next to it and said a prayer for you :l*v:

Kathleen
9th May 2011, 07:53 PM
I have just read your post and am amazed because even though we've never met, you have been on my mind all day today. I have really been missing Jade, so I know how you feel and every time I think of Jade, I think of you. I can't say the right words to make you feel better, but please take comfort knowing that you are not alone with your grief. I went to watch a dog show on Saturday and there were 15 cavaliers there. It was wonderful to see them and cuddle some ( I know some of the breeders) and it was so therapeutic for me. Stay strong Anne and remember your happy times with Ella and who knows..... another little four-legged friend may be just around the corner? My heart is with you.

Desrae
9th May 2011, 11:28 PM
just go with it. You know you're in the worst of the grief right now, but as my Mom always said 'this too shall pass', and it will!! You have such a great support of friends and family, we're here for you. Things will get better, and as Kathleen said, another four-legged friend might just be around the corner. Ella was a special sweet girl and can never be replaced, but she wouldn't want you to be lonely. So just go with the flow and let the tears out and know that there's sunshine after the rain!:flwr:

tara
9th May 2011, 11:37 PM
You are absolutely in my thoughts. You can and will get through this. The pain is so very raw right now. Hang in there and know that there are many people behind you lifting you up when the burden feels too great.

mommytoClaire
10th May 2011, 02:29 AM
Awww Anne, I am so sorry you are feeling this way. I just read this, and hope that the prayers of so many that care about you made a difference today!

I will continue to pray for you. I think of you every morning, knowing that you miss her so terribly.

I promise you it will get better, but you are in the thick of it right now. Give it time, okay?

I WILL pray for you every single day. I promise!

Furrfoot
10th May 2011, 06:32 AM
(((hugs))) Saying a prayer for you as I type. Please do find someone to speak to who can help you find a way through this if it becomes too much for you to bear on your own. We lost our Mattie last year, and it is still so saddening to see her pics, but it is healing.
Concentrate on her being happy and pain free, and we will be praying that your healing will start soon, and that soon you remember her with joy when you think of her, and not only the sadness that came when she left, which is where I finally am when I think of our Clint. It took awhile, and I am still waiting for that about Mattie, but I know it will come, and I want you to know that it will come too.

robbieswan
10th May 2011, 06:49 AM
You are in our thoughts. xx

BrooklynMom
10th May 2011, 09:11 AM
Oh Anne.
I cannot imagine how much your heart hurts right now, but I am saying prayer for you. A really, really big one.
Remember too that it is okay to feel this sad. Dog, human, or fish...we all need to go through the stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance) before we can begin to heal. However, I believe that the stages of grief are more like a spiral, and you travel in and out of them through the processes vs. just staying in one to move onto another. The spaces between each spiral begin to get wider though, and soon you will feel a sense of peace. One of the things people try to do in grief is to say that "in order to accept, one must not be sad anymore"...well, that is not true. Acceptance can mean anything. "I accept that this is a sad place for me right now", "I accept that Ella needed to be free, and I will hurt because of my love for her", "I accept that this is moving me into a new phase of life and I am willing to go through the emotions to get there".

There is lots of ways to "accept", but the most important thing is that you let yourself feel this way. Feel free to spiral through these stages. Feel free to acknowledge your pain (just like you did here), and really be with what you are feeling. The worst thing to do is pretend you are okay if you are not, and if you are sad, let yourself fully feel that emotion, it is happening to you for a reason and you body needs to work through that energy.

I always feel like writing helps me. Maybe write Ella a letter. Maybe let her write you one.
I write so much and it has helped me through a lot of grief...certainly doesn't fix the pain, but I guess helps with the movement forward.

My heart and hugs go out to you. We are all here for you and this is such a great place to get support when you need it! xx

GraciesMom
20th May 2011, 04:23 PM
But if it gets too tough for you, please do what I did when I lost my best girlfriend in a very tragic accident. I went to a grief counselor and ended up going to regular therapy for a bit. I am not sure that I could have recovered nearly so well without it. Good friends and time do help, but sometimes it is not enough. Sometimes we all need something to help us find a way out of the darkness.

gamefanz
20th May 2011, 04:57 PM
Even though I am a newbie to the site and don't know the background on your situation, I just want to say that my thoughts are with you. I wish I could give out real hugs but I hope this helps ((((())))))
I lost our Peke last month to complications of a heart murmur/enlarged heart and I really had so hard of a time that my mom offered to fly up here to be with me. I could not stop crying. I had nightmares for awhile. I took it worse than my daughter.
What has helped me more than anything else was laying him to rest at a cemetery and being able to go visit any time I wanted. I am able to get it out and talk to him but also come home and not have all of his things in my face. They are in a special box in a drawer just for him. It has helped me cope.
When we sat down as a family and discussed a new dog it was not even on my radar but I knew that I had so much love to give and I didn't want to shut my family down to a new dog so I caved. I am so glad I did because next month we will be able to give all of this love to a new dog. I know our Peke would want us to move on and give a dog a home with love.
I hope in time that the pain will subside and you can be happy again.
Many hugs ((((())))
Becky

gaynor
20th May 2011, 05:51 PM
Please try and talk to someone i lost my bestfriend lucy 2 years ago and i really needed someone, They suggested i get a teddy bear name her ella and when you need a cuddle and a think of your friend sit and just hug it will help, i know everyone says time heals but we never no how long it will take.
I send you all my thoughts for you at this time just take each day as it comes,
keep strong
gaynor toby and molly
and my girl lucy who i remember everyday.

goda
20th May 2011, 06:16 PM
I am so sorry and you are in my thoughts. Which isn't enough because it's the internet and all I want to do is hug you and not let you go.