PDA

View Full Version : Advice on deciding on fostering



anniemac
28th May 2011, 07:30 PM
I have volunteered for cavalier rescue in transport etc. But when I had ella it would be too much for me to foster. I got someone in charlotte to help the regional coordinator and she had a 2 year old she ended up adopting. Now she got 2 brothers in to foster both overweight but there are 5 more coming in this weekend. They are in need of foster homes most.

I do feel like my home is empty but I am not wanting to get another cavalier now. I don't know if I would go the rescue route or a puppy from a breeder that of course is health focused. Either way I'm not ready financially or emotionally for either one.

I work so I thought I would not be a good match for a foster and I know some have certain issues but if one would fit, what are the thoughts. I'm scared I would become too attached since I don't have ella and honestly I'm not ready to make that commitment.

I said I'm interested in learning obedience and could help out with going to classes, help when needed to take one off hands, but maybe I just talked myself out of it. I know these may need homes and fosters are needed but what are ones thoughts especially those in rescue

Sent from my Droid using Tapatalk

Pat
28th May 2011, 09:35 PM
Anne, I have a lot of thoughts (and an opinion!) based on many years of fostering. I'll email you (not PM here) later today or tomorrow. I just don't share personal information on a public forum, but I'm happy to talk about it privately.

Pat

anniemac
28th May 2011, 09:37 PM
Anne, I have a lot of thoughts (and an opinion!) based on many years of fostering. I'll email you (not PM here) later today or tomorrow. I just don't share personal information on a public forum, but I'm happy to talk about it privately.

Pat

Thanks pat! Its not something I want to take lightly as with any responsibility with a dog

Sent from my Droid using Tapatalk

anniemac
28th May 2011, 09:51 PM
I'm actually thinking no but would still like you to email me.

Sent from my Droid using Tapatalk

GraciesMom
28th May 2011, 10:58 PM
I have never done it myself so no information to offer. I know that you would be a very loving foster parent, but so much more to it I'm sure.

goda
29th May 2011, 12:03 AM
Personally, I could never foster a Cavalier and have to give it up. Couldn't do it, I know that now.

mommytoClaire
29th May 2011, 04:02 AM
Anne I have a friend who lost her dog a few years ago and still doesn't have another dog, but, she fosters regularly. I don't know how she does it, not getting attached. But she said there is such a great need, she feels called.

But I will tell you, she didn't start right away. But I know your home feels empty. Take your time with it, okay?

anniemac
29th May 2011, 06:55 AM
I actually decided against it. There is a need and I feel I can help out with little things, vet visits, transportation, and if someone goes out of town or needs a break.

I just think a Foster maybe later not now.

Sent from my Droid using Tapatalk

meljoy
29th May 2011, 12:30 PM
Anne
I think you are very wise to not foster at the moment. Your emotions must still be so raw and a little dog may pick that up.
What you're doing at the moment with volunteering is a fantastic way to help out and Im sure that one day you will feel able to offer a forever home to another little cav:luv:
When the times right you'll know it.:wggle:

GraciesMom
29th May 2011, 01:57 PM
I actually decided against it. There is a need and I feel I can help out with little things, vet visits, transportation, and if someone goes out of town or needs a break.

I just think a Foster maybe later not now.

Sent from my Droid using Tapatalk

What a lovely thing to do!!! If any dogs need help near me.....please let me know. Happy to meet you part way.

Karlin
29th May 2011, 02:27 PM
I think you are wise too not to take this on right now. You need time to yourself and I wouldn't consider a dog until you know you are at peace and strong again after losing Ella. As long as that loss is raw and painful, it is too early to consider fostering or taking on a new dog -- not least as it isn't fair on a new dog to need to fill the vacuum of Ella.

Once you feel healed from that experience, I'd then take a very long consideration on whether fostering is the right route (it doesn't suit everyone and 'losing' every dog can be just too hard for some people; also it may mean people find they end up permanently with a dog that really is too much commitment because they fall for a foster that probably isn't the right match).

Fostering can be very difficult if people work during the day too (many rescues also won't foster to a working home because the dogs need time with people and may be difficult dogs to begin with). Many of us -- me included -- didn't even get a dog until we were at a point where we would be home much of the time, could put them in daycare, or arrange a daily walker, or retired...I only got Jaspar, my first, once I started working from home and my travel schedule decreased dramatically by choice. For that reason too it may be best to just wait for the right home and work situation to emerge in the future.

I'd just give yourself time over the coming months.

pagep
1st June 2011, 03:28 PM
When we lost or cavalier Oscar recently, we thought we would never get another dog again. He was with us for 14 years and it was so heartbreaking at the time. I dont think people realise how empty a home feels when you lose a dog -it is quite literally like losing a family member. After about 5 weeks, we were considering fostering, and looking at this forum when we saw a beautiful tri cavalier has been taken in by a local pound.

We enquired about fostering him but were told they were looking for a permanent home as he was already in foster care. Something told us we should at least go and see him; we did and decided to adopt him permanently.

It has turned out to be the best decision we have ever made. Waldo does not in any replace Oscar; he has his own personality, and is a very different dog. But we love him to bits, and in many ways we feel that Oscar lives on in him -he has returned that energy, vitality and love that disappeared when Oscar passed away.

Everyone is different -you, and only you will know when it is the right time to have another dog in your home following your very sad loss. I hope that our story illustrates that it is possible to entertain the thought of homing another dog at some point in time, even after such a traumatic loss as the one you experienced.

sunshinekisses
1st June 2011, 05:04 PM
I foster dogs from time to time. But my home situation is very open as I am a stay-at-home mom. Not saying someone that works couldn't do it. If the rescue is good at placing their fosters, they will match a dog that will work for your situation too.
I get attatched to every single dog that comes through my home...and I think that is how you should do it. Some I like more than others. But it is so rewarding when the dog finds its forever home, and when you can see the family light up when they meet for the first time! It is very addicting really. :)
Some people can't let go and that is fine too. I call that foster failure with a good ending! Adopting your foster dog is very neat too. Not everyone can do it, so to volunteer in other ways is very helpful as well. I am one person that can't be without a dog so when one dies another is not far behind.