Bonding with Rescue Cavs

[LovesCavaliers]

Thank you all so much for your comments. I really appreciate you taking the time to share your views with me.

Foster Mum's: Thank heaven for you! You're doing a wonderful service. I would enjoy doing this too, but don't know how I would cope with saying "Bye Bye"- sure I would probably end up with a houseful of beauties.

I would be happy to rescue a cav. I would certainly give him/her lots of love and would feel very rewarded knowing the dog was safe with me.

I will give all your advice much thought and won't rush into anything. It's good to share ideas and make an informed choice.

Regards
Mary

[Marilyn]

I've had my little rescue, Jenny, since July and she is getting better, but she is still fearful if one moves to quickly and has maintained her "trust" issues. I think she will probably have this to deal with possibly forever and that is fine. She is secure in her home, well fed, healthy, and much loved. I don't expect a lot from her so anything I get is GREAT! I cannot undo 16 months of the miserable life she had, I can only make each day a good one for her. I also think we'll probably have the potty issues, but we are diligent about going out every few hours with lots of praise and a little reward when she does go outside. Maybe one day it will click for her. All I know is that she isn't the same dog I picked up in July! Her coat is better and she went from 8.2 pounds to 10.1! She has made Emma's life a lot more fun and that in itself is a really good thing! I would do it again in a heartbeat.

[Karlin]

Marilyn that is a great story!

I cannot recommend rescues of all types highly enough BUT-- not all types of rescue suit all types of people (which is why working closely with a reputable rescue that properly evaluates dogs and talks to you in detail too, is important). Plus people need to be aware that rescue dogs are not the same as getting a duplicate of the dog you have (this seems obvious but many people at least subconsciously are imagining a second Rover, not a fresh personality and one that likely has some issues). I like people to understand the potential challenges, small or large, to be clear to a rescue on what they are looking for, and to let the dogs be who they are and come around in their own time (with support and love and training of course).

Also on potty treats -- try always using something of really high value like a piece of chicken or ham or dried liver -- most dogs will be eager to perform for something they REALLY love. Dr Ian Dunbar talks about how dogs figure out fast that they can 'cash in' their urine and poops for FOOD... just hold it and go where they want and I get great food! If the treat is lower value -- just a bit of kibble or biscuit --- the motivation is much weaker. Think about being a kid and the difference in motivation to do a chore if your parent was offering $1 vs $5.

[Ashley]

If I could really just echo pretty much what Karlin has said.

We adopted Murphy about 5 months ago. He came to us very aloof and not overly into affection, unlike most cavs i know. More than love and cuddles he needed discipline and structure to his life. We have always been rather strict with our dogs... not allowed on sofa unless invited, not allowed in the bedroom etc etc... and this is what he needed. Hearing from his foster-mum in Ireland we knew he had been in a very bad way, although he was not as bad as this after having spent time with the Spaniel Trust(where we adopted him from). He needed probably about the same, if not more work than a puppy. It was a different kind of work, on his behaviour and training.
Five months down the line, he is still a bit aloof, in the sense he is quite independent.... doesnt have to be touching me all the time like Holly does, but does like to be in the same room or at least know where we are. He LOVES cuddles more than Holly though. I wasnt even sure that was possible in a dog. I found I bonded with him pretty quickly, but I am aware from family members and friends that the bonding process can take longer.

At the end of the day, I will never know exactly what my wee Murph went through, but I can make the rest of his life the best it can be. That doesnt always mean showered with kisses and cuddles and treats etc, but it means giving him the structure, discipline, and unconditional love he deserves. With a rescue, you will have to accept that there are things you cannot change about them... whatever it may be. They will always, imo, have the memories of what happened to them.

Murphy needs to trust people before he will happily play with them, or cuddle in to them.

If you are going to adopt a rescue, i think it is pertinent to look at why a rescue, why not a puppy; are you prepared to put all the time into training and working on any behavioural issues; do you have the time and maybe people to turn to if you had any problems (this probably relates to Karlins point about looking into rescue orgz); is it a cuddly/kissy dog you are looking for; are you looking for a dog to act in a particular way (remember rescues already have a developed personality externally to anything you may try to teach them, or how you may try to shape them). Yes a puppy will require house training and sleepless nights etc, but so may a rescue!

I just know of some other people who have taken on rescues thinking it would be easier than a pup, and it has turned out to be more difficult and hasnt worked out. It is is a big decision.

I may be biased on the issue because it worked out really well for me, for Murphy, and im sure Holly will agree she loves having Murph about, and my OH will defo agree.... (he's daddys wee boy! lol ).

Sorry to have rambled on there, but i thought having a personal point of view there may help you one way or another.

[sins]

Perhaps Mary, if you try fostering first, it might give you an idea of what a rescue dog is all about.Sooner or later you'll find one that you fall so much in love with and will fit in with your home environment and get on with the other canine members and you'll apply to keep. I think I've fostered about six, two of which I fell in love and came very close to keeping one ,until someone who was so perfect for her turned up and could give her so much more than I could. To be honest you won't bond with every dog you foster,and you'll be ok about rehoming them,the best way to describe it is satisfaction that you've kept a dog safe until the right home came through for the dog, but when you find the one for you, you'll just know!
Sins

[cosmic81]

I am currently fostering a cocker. He is my first foster kid. My bf and I were concerned that we wouldn't like him as much our own since his eyes look funny. (Post Cherry-Eye Surgery) WE LOVE HIM! He is so sweet.
GO FOR IT.

[ttsabin]

the two i have rehomed settled straight in,they were just as loving as the one i had from a puppy.
they didnt come from a bad past so that probably helped things along.

[AT]

I currently have two foster puppyfarm cavs who came in last night, already they screamed after my mother when I tried to walk them away from her at toilet time ( guess who's been giving them biscuits)
Then I had to walk along with a dog attached to my leg because she wanted cuddles