Okay, after several consults with Dr. Jeffries and a second opinion, I have more information. Mel (in addition to SM) may have a vertebrae in his spine that is overlapping his skull in the general direction of his brain. We are going to do a CT scan to confirm this, but the surgery proposed for Mel is directed at removing this obstruction. Dr. Jeffries is proposing that we take this route as opposed to the graft or mesh surgery and is hopeful it will relieve some of his symptoms. Neither neurologist I spoke with seemed to have much confidence in the grafting or mesh procedures and this scares/depresses me. Mel's syrinx is considerably large and I do feel that some additional measures must be taken, I feel responsible for his condition and how severe it is. Every time Mel had a crying fit I took him to the vet and so many of them just kept telling me he was too young to have SM. I wanted to believe them so much I ignored my suspicions and called him quirky.
Karlin, Your right about it seeming sudden. Though I wasn't surprised at his diagnosis I feel every change (anticipated or current) in our lives so acutely I don't know what to do. When Mel isn't around to be upset by me, I cry so profusely. I vacillate from angry to sad so much during these times, I feel like I'm a crazy person.
In the end, I am sure I feel as all of you do. I just want to help him so much, to make him better no matter the cost- and no one can give us the guarantee we so badly need.