Results 1 to 9 of 9

Thread: Heartbroken after a loss

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    Location
    Washington, DC
    Posts
    28
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default Heartbroken after a loss

    Hi everybody,

    thank you very much for adding me to this group. I'm not a cavalier owner, not anymore. Out little girl left us 6 weeks ago this Sunday. She was nearly 21 months old, ruby cavalier. The sweetest thing on the planet. Her death was such a shock to us as she was playing with us outside and the she was taken from us few minutes later. I don't think that I will ever get over this.
    She was a healthy, funny, cute dog. Best friend to us and to our daughters. She was watching my kids and always wanted to be a part of their play. And she was a baby to me.
    First seizure came in May. Doctor at the ER was pretty sure it was an epileptic one. Some other vets weren't so sure about that. The second came in june and I still didn't know for sure what is this. I was told by neurologist about cavaliers and their problems and we decided to do MRI along with the fluid test. The result was Arnold Chiari malformation and SM. We were so upset. Neurologist gave us medication to control her seizures and some for lowering the amount of the fluid. She was doing much better and then in July 21 another seizure came. I gave her valium and the we lost her few minutes after that. I'm not sure if it was still at home, or in my arms while carrying her to the car, or on the way to to clinic. It's honestly too blurry. Doctors then said, that this wasn't probably SM, what took her life, but It could be as well. We don't know.
    My past 6 weeks are full of pain, guilt, depression and I honestly don't know how I'm going to live without her and will be always wondering what took her from us. I'm blaming myself for not knowing, not acting quicker, for vets not to be able to find what is going on with her. My husband and I were in such a shock, that we didn't think about an autopsy or anything else and took her home with us.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    14
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by marcela View Post
    Hi everybody,

    thank you very much for adding me to this group. I'm not a cavalier owner, not anymore. Out little girl left us 6 weeks ago this Sunday. She was nearly 21 months old, ruby cavalier. The sweetest thing on the planet. Her death was such a shock to us as she was playing with us outside and the she was taken from us few minutes later. I don't think that I will ever get over this.
    She was a healthy, funny, cute dog. Best friend to us and to our daughters. She was watching my kids and always wanted to be a part of their play. And she was a baby to me.
    First seizure came in May. Doctor at the ER was pretty sure it was an epileptic one. Some other vets weren't so sure about that. The second came in june and I still didn't know for sure what is this. I was told by neurologist about cavaliers and their problems and we decided to do MRI along with the fluid test. The result was Arnold Chiari malformation and SM. We were so upset. Neurologist gave us medication to control her seizures and some for lowering the amount of the fluid. She was doing much better and then in July 21 another seizure came. I gave her valium and the we lost her few minutes after that. I'm not sure if it was still at home, or in my arms while carrying her to the car, or on the way to to clinic. It's honestly too blurry. Doctors then said, that this wasn't probably SM, what took her life, but It could be as well. We don't know.
    My past 6 weeks are full of pain, guilt, depression and I honestly don't know how I'm going to live without her and will be always wondering what took her from us. I'm blaming myself for not knowing, not acting quicker, for vets not to be able to find what is going on with her. My husband and I were in such a shock, that we didn't think about an autopsy or anything else and took her home with us.
    I am soo soo sorry for your loss. I am a new Cav owner (he is not even home with me yet) but I have had other dogs in the past and lost a couple to illness as well. It is so hard to go through. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please do not blame yourself. You did everything you could.
    In sympathy,
    Pam

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Chicago area
    Posts
    1,777
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    You have been through a terrible nightmare. I am so sorry. To lose a cavalier is horrible, but to lose one so young and so unexpectedly is too hard to make sense of. These dogs are part of our families and they leave such a huge whole in our hearts. I know it's hard not to blame yourself for acting quicker, but you did do everything you could for her. I know it's hard, but in time you will remember the love you shared with her and the joy she brought to you and your daughters. Please keep coming on Cavalier Talk. Once a cavalier owner always a cavalier owner. We welcome you with open arms. May your sweet little ruby rest in peace and may you find some peace in your memories of her.
    Bev
    Oliver (blenheim, born 3/2001), Riley (black & tan, born 8/2002,), Madison (ruby, born 9/2003), and Oz (tri-color, born 7/2007)

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    North Manchester
    Posts
    531
    Post Thanks / Like
    Blog Entries
    1

    Default

    Oh my word what a terrible shock for you and your family. I cannot imagine what you must be feeling. 21 months is no age for a dog to die and my heart goes out to you all. I hope you might find some comfort from the forum.
    HollyDolly

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Yorktown, Virginia USA
    Posts
    1,429
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Oh man, what a terrible story. I'm sure you are completely heartbroken. I wish there was some great advice or magical words that would ease your pain but I don't. I can only offer sympathy.

    You do not need to be a current cavalier owner to "hang out" on cavaliertalk. I was a member, a active member month before I got my little Fletcher. All cavalier lovers are totally welcome.

    I hope being here will help you heal.
    Melissa
    "If you don't own a dog, at least one, there is not necessarily anything wrong with you, but there may be something wrong with your life."
    -Roger Caras

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    Location
    Washington, DC
    Posts
    28
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Thank you all for your warm welcome and your nice words. It means so much to me. I'm still trying to accept that she's gone, which is hard to do. She was the dog, that my daughters wanted so much. So she came to our home Christmas 2011. Kids woke up and there she was. I never knew that dog can steal your heart like that. I guess that must be a cavalier thing to do, because they are so sweet. I still have hard time to sleep and functioning somewhat, but falling asleep is the hardest. I'm trying to figure out this site, to find answers why she was taken this young, if SM played a part or what else it could been. The thing is, I'm not ready for another dog, not possible. But in the same time I'm looking. I guess I'm looking for HER and that's not a good thing. My husband told me to be careful, he's not ready either. But I was thinking to do it for kids. People say, don't get the same breed, but I can't imagine to have other dog then cavalier. Not sure when is the right time either, because one cannot predict the reaction that new puppy may trigger. And it may be a positive one. I just don't know. I'm reading more and more about cavaliers and their health issues, but seeing so many people have a cavalier without any problems is giving me a hope.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Yorktown, Virginia USA
    Posts
    1,429
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Oh marcela, I hate to confirm this but cavaliers are prone to SM, CM, MVD, Dry Eye.....I could go on and on. You, like most of us here have fallen in love with a bit of what can be considered a "doomed" breed. The numbers of how many cavalier are effected by SM is debatable I guess but I have read as many as 70%!!!! It is shocking. I have also read that almost 100% of 10 year old cavaliers have some form of heart murmur. Heart failure! I encourage you to continue your "cavalier journey". Please go read the SM and MVD forum on cavaliertalk I know I have a ton of questions, feel free to ask away most people around here will happily answer ANYTHING.

    I know you thinking oh man so I can't have another cavalier EVER!!!! Well, that is a personal question you MUST ask yourself. There ARE things you can do to TRY and even out the odds of ending up with a sick dog, or losing one so young. Choosing a breeder is a HUGE part. There are what "we" (cavaliertalk people) call good breeders out there who are doing all they can to produce puppies who do not get early onset conditions (breeding to eliminate these hereditary illness has not been successful) these breeders follow several protocols again to try an avoid early onset.


    I do think cavaliers are a one of a kind breed. I have pretty much always had at least one dog in my house however I have NEVER loved a dog like I do my cavalier. Some people call that one special dog your heart dog. I also believe you are able to have more than one special relationship with a dog.
    Melissa
    "If you don't own a dog, at least one, there is not necessarily anything wrong with you, but there may be something wrong with your life."
    -Roger Caras

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Istanbul/Turkey
    Posts
    37
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    ohhh, I am very sorry for your loss. Please do NOT blame yourself, my prayers with you!!
    Ebru&Duses

  9. #9
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Hampshire, UK
    Posts
    78
    Post Thanks / Like

    Default

    Im so sorry to hear about your loss. My jazz is my baby too, and I know it will tear my heart in two the day I have to say goodbye.

    Give yourself time to grieve, and don't listen to anyone who says, "but she was just a dog". And one day when your heart is mended a little, hopefully you'll find the courage to give another dog a happy loving home, just take all the time you need.
    Nicki
    Proud owner of Jazz

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •