It has been 11 weeks this past Sunday since our precious girl died during the seizure. The worse two months of my life. Absolutely horrid. I don't know why I started looking for puppy since the only dog that I want is her. I want her back so badly and I'm hurting so much.
I guess Because I feel the emptiness in the house? Because I feel that my daughters (11 and 13) should have a dog, new puppy to love? For our family to be complete again? I don't know what it is, maybe my subconscious is denying all the facts and looking for her? I know it won't heal it, I know I wont' feel better about her death. We went to see a litter and it felt so good!!! I was so happy for a moment! The little cuddly things crawling everywhere, snuggling and licking my face! Of course it triggered all the emotions later. For me and the kids.
I'm looking for breeder that scans the dogs. But is this really the case? Will that prevent me from another loss? From another suffering dog? Is there actually a higher chance for a healthy dog?
Nairin's breeder has a new litter. They are so cute!!! Ruby and black and tan again. Nairin was ruby, so it would be really hard I guess. But this breeder won't test for SM. Do I take the risk and buy one? I feel so strangely connected to this kennel and those puppies, like she's calling me.
Or shall I get puppy with awesome pedigree over several generations all clear? I did find some. But "ONLY" have to make that decision.