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my dad

lindylou

Well-known member
hi ct friends
sorry i hav'ent being on hear for a while but my 93.5 dad has being very poorly he has progreesing dementis copd and now heart failure
im unable to give him 24 /7 care so i have had to put him in a care home so he can have professional care.he dos'ent no me sometimes when i go to see him but he always asks about louie (is'ent that strange)
 
Sorry about your Dad. It must be very hard on you. Is it possible for you to bring Louie to see him? Some care facilities will allow it.
Sending you hugs. :hug:
 
I am sorry to hear that. My Grandmother, who I shared a birthday with refused to come live with my parents when she became unable to live alone. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease just before that. I am the oldest grandchild and I visited her the most it was hard on days she didn't know who I was. I just thanked my stars she was happy in her own confusion, she has no idea who I was but she was happy I was there. The home she lived in was great, she developed a little habit of calling family members in the middle of the night asking for things, like nickles for bingo (its funny now to remember that) and they handled her lovingly, a nurse even made her a little poster/clock thing to help her figure out when was a good time to call us.
It's hard to care for someone we love so dearly near the end of their lives, but it is also an experience I would never regret. My Grandma passed almost 7 years ago now, she had just turned 98 years old. She lived an amazing happy long life.
Take care of yourself too, and do the best you can visiting your father. It's never easy when time gets small.
 
Just seeing this and sorry to hear about your father. Dementia is a strange thing -- have been through this with my grandmother and father to different degrees and it can be hard sometimes not to take things personally but we all tried to see the humour and oddness of things -- which you are clearly doing. I think they always know that someone who cares is there, even when they may be confused or quiet or angry or uncertain. It makes me sad when people stop seeing a relative only because they have dementia. In the case of my dad, he sometimes was not sure who I was but could recognise his favourite tenors and sopranos :). So I enjoyed playing music for him. I think animals and especially cavaliers, touch people in special ways -- that's why they make good therapy dogs. :D
 
So sorry to hear this. It must be so hard to give him the care he needs and by putting him in a care home he will get the care 24/7.
My friends Father has dementia and he remembers very little but when I see him he asks where my little dog is:)
He has owned cavaliers in the past so something strikes a chord.
Thinking of you

Mel
 
I think "MomObvious" nailed it with her counsel to "take care of yourself too." This can be extremely taxing on families and you need to take time for yourself and family without felling guilty.
 
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